Asian: OMGWTFBBQSAUCE???

OMG-I've been living in serious denial for a long time.  I was getting ready to take a shower this morning & caught a glimpse of my right arm in the mirror...I did a double take & realized that I have bat wings, grandma arms, whatever...I kind of knew I had them & my right arm is worse because I had shoulder surgery & ever since then the muscle tone hasn't been the same.  Anyway, what I caught a true glimpse of was what kind of fat was hanging out in there.  I literally got sick, repulsed & almost threw up.  I could see the yellow of my fat in a certain area - you know, the kind you see when people have plastic surgery & they cut out the skin & flip it over & you see the yellow nasty fat.  All I can say is that I am sick just writing this.  

I see myself every day, but this really hit home.  That unhealthy fat is NOT supposed to be on my body.  Not for aesthetic reasons, but for just pure health.  Ugh...So I feel like today was my Aha moment (as Tex had mentioned).  No cupcake, junk food, coke or anything is worth feeling & looking this way.  I had a really good lunch date with Tex today & we hit on a lot of the emotional/mental aspect of my life and well, baby steps.  But, I feel encouraged & believed in :)  That is worth the feelings of detox and cleansing my body.  

So, my weekend was kind of a bust in regards to food, but I went to yoga this morning & it literally was like the first time I took Crossfit & I almost threw up.  I tried a new studio for convenience, but I am going to sign up at the one I like. I STILL feel sick. I am not drinking a damn coke though!!!!  BAT Motherfucking Wings BEGONE....Along with the rest of the unhealthy fat....

I hope everyone is well.  XXOO Asian